free agent requires team for 6 days fitba

[bendover]

i'll be knocking around speyside during the 6 days, got other things apart from orienteering on the agenda but if anyone needs a rock in defence (and it's a big solid rock, believe me) for their fitba team then drop me a line.

i'm available on a bosman, but will accept snus instead of wages/appearance fees.

[Meat Market]

Like bendover I am a free agent this summer having been sacked from Heriot-Watt United for being petulant and crying like a girl for not getting my way. I will be available from Day 4 (I am a big game player - no qualifiers for me and no 3rd place playoffs mind!)

To sum up if its a hard working, hard tackling midfield maestro you're after then you should definitely look elsewhere. However if its a ball greedy 30 goals a season, toe poking, goal poaching, lazy bastard who sits 4 yards from the opposition goal and shouts abuse at the rest of the team waiting for the ball then I'm your man. Occasionally I will play in goals.

PS. Successful applicants will be able to accommodate:
a) My oversized head
b) My tantrums

[candyman]

haha, Fish is coming up as well dover, maybe we should make an old, injured, unfit and fat team...

[Dan]

aye, im up for playing too if anyone wants/needs me

[J.Tullster]

Aye, if anyone else is looking for someone, I'm up for playing. Don't mind playing in goals. I m contracted to Rangers, but have a 1 beer buy out clause.

[Wattok]

...and there you have a team.

[bedders]

yeh and keep em comin! we do need 12 teams to make ir financially viable so anyone who doesn't have a team but wants to play get yourselves advertised!

Also, this competition is open to all ages, and you'll be matched with similar aged teams in the first round so if you thought you'd be too young (or old) to enter you're not!

This is not an advert

[ruth]

awesome, i feel another beer drinking, sun bathing (hopefully) ass ok cheers squad is necessary...

[brooner]

brooner would like to play football and not get broken, thanks!

[Becks]

I am available, with the winning endorsement from a 16year old Czech Boy of "You're not s**t, you're just not very good at all." Form an orderly queue, please!

[DM]

Bedders

Is it correct that anyone shouting the j word in the campsite will be docked 1 goal?

You could lose before you even start!

[bedders]

no.

And anyway that is an entirely unfounded rumour.

[greywolf]

any other ancient (or not so ancient) jokers game for mutual footy-related embarrassment?